Who Hurt You?

Yesterday at work, one of the managers called Josh was joking with a coworker about a Feedback Card she got (which read "Good"), and he was joking about her sucking and whatnot...we were taking it all pretty lightly and she was even smiling and we were all laughing. Then she asked me, "I'm pretty sure the card says "Good,"... that means, "Good," right?" I responded with a light-hearted "Yeah?" Then Josh proceeds to (very sarcastically and demeaning, by the way) tell her "She is PREGNANT, she doesn't know what she's talking about..."

And then, I proceeded to be seething with anger and even exploded an "Excuse me?"...he not only mocked the fact that I was pregnant, but he even imitated my accent and my hand-on-waist pose.

I've never wanted to kick someone's b@lls so hard in my entire life.

But after sleeping it all off, and watching some Criminal Minds and reading some funny things, and having some praying time...I discovered it was worthless being mad at what happened. It's done. I can't change what happened. I can only change my attitude about it all and let it all go. Not saying I felt bullied and demeaned just because I'm pregnant. In fact, I think he picks on me even more because of that same fact!

And I think he has a reason to do that. I mean, what could possibly had happened that he has the need to demean pregnant/Mexican/women?

I know it doesn't make sense, but I feel sorry for him. I might have something that he doesn't. He doesn't smile, doesn't mention wife or kids (yet he wears a wedding band), and he is short... I'm not joking, he is about as tall as me, maybe one inch shorter. He makes up for his stature with his attitude.

I am trying to be forgiving and passive about this, hopefully I won't see him until next time I work (Monday) and by then he might be nice... but I won't go down without a warning. And next time, things will get ugly. And the beauty of it is that I actually have the support of ALL my coworkers, so if I tell the head manager or the GM about this situation, they will prevent him from 'firing' me (ha, like he could).

But yea. This is my little rant of the day. Hopefully it will be the last time I have to talk about this. I'd hate to send him to the moon... with my foot... up his butt.

Blessings,
Natalie <3

P.s: if you're rude to pregnant women the same way this guy was to me... you deserve a kick in the b@lls, just saying.

All About That Belly

Ah, pregnancy... where you feel little flutters, little kicks, your significant other rubs your belly, brings you food...have cravings, feel like the lady on that scene in the movie Alien where the thing comes out of her through her belly, you feel like a whale, and then cry because you just ate half a three-pint bucket of ice cream all by yourself...but you know what? That is all ok! You are growing a little human! So what if you put extra pounds on? Your body will not be ruined, it never was. Your body was home and food for your little one, love it!

Being pregnant has been one of my biggest adventures, ever. I am loving every single happy and crappy moment about it! Especially the food and the belly rubs from friends... I know, it's kinda weird. Some pregnant women don't like being touched at all, or even asked if they are pregnant!

See, that's one of my things: why do pregnant women (or women in general) get mad when people ask them if they are pregnant? Maybe is just a cultural thing, but even before being pregnant when I was asked that question I always took it humorously and said, "Ha! No, not yet" or something... ok, maybe I don't get offended because I am as skinny as a twig, always been, and have no body image issues like other women, who unfortunately didn't receive the blessing of a skinny body and/or fast metabolism... which is perfectly ok! Whether 'perfect' body or not, everyone of us have the capability of being confident and feeling pretty.

I know that the question of "are you pregnant?" sometimes gets you by surprise and makes you feel bad or uncomfortable, but it's just a question! Not a mock, not a statement, not a body-shaming insult...is just a question!

I love being pregnant, I would love it if more people asked me if I was pregnant! One day at work I got a family with two children in my section, and the dad boldly told me "turn sideways for me?" I did, and then he nodded... his wife looked embarrassed, but nonchalantly I said, "yes, I am pregnant. It's ok to ask!" and then we had a few laughs about that. He felt confident in 'asking' because he saw my cross necklace (which I always wear).

If someone asks you if you are pregnant and you are not, don't take it personally! Laugh about it, and move on. Women sometimes need to get over themselves. When it's about image, you should always have the confidence to say yes or no at that question, and move on. That person most likely will take the answer and forget about it, while, as you get offended, you keep thinking, "how dare he/she asked me such a question? I know I'm fat, but damn! How rude"...see? Right there! You just body-shamed yourself. You turned that person's question into an insult for yourself and you let it affect you. That is not ok. We need to always take things as it is, and respond like adults about it.

The same thing goes for women who are actually pregnant! I saw a meme a long time ago where there was a row of pregnant women figures at different stages of pregnancy and the headline said, "when to ask if a woman is pregnant", and the bottom line had the stages of the pregnancy with the word Never underneath it...I mean, come on! If someone asks you if you are pregnant, and you are pregnant, why not just say yes?!

Maybe I'm just weird like that and I never take things personally (especially if they are true and I have no reason to be offended). I think you shouldn't, either. Makes life easier ;)

Blessings, 
Natalie <3

Dignity vs Independence

In this crazy, twisted world we live in, there is no lack of mention about High School teenage girls who give their bodies away...yes, I'm talking about having sex. And yes, I am aware that this is a very bold and harsh statement I am about to make...but as a defender of purity and women's dignity, I cannot stay quiet about something that God created to be beautiful and sacred.

I just want to mention that I don't mean to sound critical. This is merely based on years of observation I've done to people of different backgrounds. And I am also exclusively speaking about teenage girls who decide to lose their virginity even before they reach college (though, at any age before marriage is almost as bad, but that's another rant for another time).

I never had sex before marriage. I stayed whole until my wedding night, and it was the best decision I've ever made. There is a certain sense of pride about such thing, and there is nothing wrong with it! If anything, I wish more girls nowadays had that sense of privacy and dignity, of wanting to defend and protect their bodies and their integrity. Now, I'm aware that this is a modern society where couples don't marry but live together and create a family without wearing a ring. But then again, some of them don't know God, and they don't understand why lovemaking is designed for couples who decide to form a union and a covenant with each other.

I've taken several Bible studies where they teach about the sexual act as a form of covenant you make with the person you are with. Back then there were private and public weddings. Everyone assumed that they were pure. Otherwise, they were stoned to death or something. Many people don't understand this, they see it as barbaric...but the fact is, purity meant so much to those who feared God that they wanted to keep their groups and villages purged of those who mocked God by being sexually impure. It only makes sense, right?

But this is not a Bible study, this is something that goes beyond defending what God designed to be dignified and defended. A woman's purity and integrity. Untouched. Delicate and fierce. All of that goes down the drain when a girl decides to give her body away as if it was disposable. And along with it, goes their spirit. Many don't think about the consequences about losing their virginity, they just think they can do whatever they want with their bodies, and it even feels liberating. It gives them a sense of empowerment over their lives, a sense of independence and strength. It makes them feel and think, "I am an independent woman who knows what she wants and how to get it and when."

But when these girls are ready to settle and look for someone special, they will not have anything to give to their significant other, if they decide to marry. They will feel so empty that the only way they will be able to fill that gap is... you guessed it, by having more sex. That is not the answer! Sex will not give you a sense of independence, or liberation. Especially if you haven't quite grown up yet.

My heart truly aches for these girls because they are missing out so much in not waiting for their wedding night to truly give yourself unashamedly to your spouse, and to receive that same wholeness from him. No, they are not living life to the fullest, they are running through it instead of really enjoying it and taking everything in, one day at a time, one feeling at a time. It's really not worth lose yourself in bodily pleasures when life is more than that!

Maybe reading this blog you will feel judged...but remember that the judgment is not coming from me.

Blessings,
Natalie <3

Inward Smile = No Smile

Now, I really don't mean to come out as judgmental or critical, but some people have that face that makes you think, "why do they look so angry all the time?" Has it ever happened to you? And then you see them with people and they are smiling and laughing and being pleasant...Maybe that is just their default face, but when I see people like that near me, I just avoid them. I don't trust a face that doesn't smile (maybe that has to do with the fact that I smile a lot, I love smiling).

And you know what's concerning to me? When I look that kind of gesture in Christians. I figured, since we have the Holy Spirit within us, we would be able to at least be passed our hard and maybe traumatizing past, and be joyful about the fact that God is with us, He came to rescue us, and He is for us. I've seen that when people become followers of God, there is a light in their eyes (in their whole face, really) that just says peace, calm, serenity... just by looking at them, you feel better!

And is the same people who you see on Facebook (or somewhere else), and you see them posting about how their life is going great, hardships and everything, posting smiling and goofy selfies... and you see them in  person and it seems like they just had a bad day. Granted, this might happen every now and then...but when is every single time you see them walking by? You can't help but wonder, right? And regularly they are very sweet and caring people once you get to know them, but how would you want to get to know someone who on the outside they seem to not like their life, at all? For me that just says, "stay away, I don't like meeting people".

It might be just me, but I am the kind of people who will not approach you if I don't see you smiling, especially if you are not smiling at me. I could see you hanging out with someone (in the same room, I may add) and be laughing and stuff... and then you turn around to see me for whatever reason, and whoosh! smile gone...(?) I mean, am I that unpleasant to be with, or even to look at? In that situation I'd just walk away! Your smile-to-serious face makes me feel unwelcomed and unliked. Why would I want to get to know someone like that, even if you are a seemingly pleasant to be around, according to those who are not me?

There is enough distrust in the world and ugliness in people as it is, why not smile at one another and be a bit pleasant with each other, even if we are strangers?

It only takes a smile to take you far with people: it can get you hired, it can get you an unbreakable friendship, it can get you trust, it can even get you a life-changing relationship that later turns into, I don't know, maybe a date? Marriage? You name it!
A smile is the most inexpensive form of affection, warmth, and welcoming one could ever show to anyone. Maybe someone you are sharing sidewalk with has had a bad day... a simple smile would let them know that everything will be ok. Maybe a smile is all an elderly lady at the supermarket needs for her to feel loved.

A smile can be given at any time, anywhere. If you don't get one in return, oh well! At least you have yours :)
Smile, it's contagious!

Love, 
Natalie <3

Called to Obedience

For a couple of days now, I've had this urge to spend time submerged in God's Word. I just want to fill my pages of my prayer notebook with His teachings and my requests. I don't really have a system, I just sit down on the loveseat in my living room with my two devotionals, my Bible, and my notebook. I open one of the devotionals, I go through the message of the day, ponder on it, and try to write down the meaning of it. I also read through the scriptures given for that day and message, and I also write about it. At the end I sometimes write a prayer, and continue with the next devotional, and then I end with where I left off from my Bible.

It's not easy to find the time to spend some quiet time with God, neither it is to MAKE time for it. You have some much more to do at home, but if you all of a sudden have this urge to spend time reading and journaling, do so! That just means that God wants to spend time with you, and He has no other way to get your attention but by giving you the urge to read! And don't even try to push it out of your mind...it will come back twice as strong, full force.

So whatever it is that you have the need to do, it might be the Holy Spirit telling you that you should do it. For example, walking by an elderly person and just smile and say "How are you?", or maybe giving your leftovers to someone you just saw on the streets, begging; or maybe the ever-present need to tell someone about God.

Maybe you feel foolish trying to obey the Holy Spirit within you the first time, but as you keep doing it, the task of obedience will come naturally. First you might dread doing it, and you might want to choose not to do them, but disobeying the task God has for you will bring consequences. First few times it will feel like He is not there, He will be silent (He will be there, but He will be silent). 

As you keep on not obeying, your heart will depart from His presence until the day you completely choose not to obey God. With not obeying God oftentimes comes the feeling that God is not there, or that He never existed in the first place. That is because with your disobedience, He took away your talents and gave it to someone else (Matthew 25:14-30), someone who would be willing to further His kingdom since you chose not to.

On the other hand, when you choose to obey the simplest of tasks, you are rewarded with more and harder tasks. When you choose to obey God in such passion and dedication, you are showing that you are able and willing to step out of your comfort zone for Him, that you love Him and want to please Him. With this, more blessings come, and more tasks come as well.

We, as the chosen of God, are called to obedience, called to further His kingdom. If you feel incapable but willing, He will show you the way, He will give you the right words to say, the right thing to do...if you flat out refuse or don't want to, then He not only will make no way, your talents will be given to someone willing but "incapable," because what we fail to understand sometimes is that God qualifies the called, not the other way around. You don't have to have done many years of ministry or have been a Christian for more than 10 years to start expanding the Kingdom of God through your obedience.

All you have to do is have a love for God, a willingness of heart, and a sense of purpose. Pray that God uses you today in whatever He sees fit, because even if you don't feel like you're making a difference with simple things, just remember this: God is the only one able to see the bigger picture. Trust, and have faith :)

Blessings,
Natalie <3

Happiness vs. Joy

I know we live in a cruel world, where cops are killing civilians, civilians are killing each other, where animals are being abused, women are being violated, and babies are being abandoned. This is a cruel and cold world we live in.

But among all this, there is the people who try and make this planet a better place: cops who buy things for other people, kids who help their superiors, and husbands who treat their wives as queens. These and some more are the clear representation of what Jesus asked us to do: "Love thy neighbor." These people, who do good to others, have problems in their lives. They are hurt, broken, ill... and yet, they choose to give the best of themselves to other people. Why? Well...why not?

Some people are often not happy with themselves and therefore project their unhappiness towards other people, especially those who look happy and seem to have everything together. Why is it that people are so offended by others' happiness? Why is it that, in our every day lives, we make an effort to not be polite when we are having a bad day? How is it possible to have a clean conscience knowing that you yelled a the waitress at the restaurant for bringing you the wrong drink (and on top of that, you most surely didn't tip her for it)?

Believe me, it is not easy to be content and polite when you are having a bad day...but you can choose to not be unhappy. Happiness comes with your circumstances, but joy is a choice despite the circumstances.

You should always choose to have joy in the midst of trouble. Not just for the sake of others around you (which by the way, the people you are being rude to, they might be already dealing with hardship on their own. Don't add to their burden!), but also for the sake of your own sanity and emotional health.

Always be joyful, and you will see changes within yourself.

Blessings,
Natalie <3

Babies = blessings

Usually before church, I volunteer in the nursery during the 10am service. Today I had the privilege to care, among other babies, for a two-month old preemie. He was one of the most adorable babies I've seen there so far, he was so sweet and he slept most of the hour.
I got to learn about this baby's story and the reason he was two months premature. Turns out (for what I heard), he is in foster care due to his biological parents (or at least his mother) taking drugs, even as she was pregnant, and might've been under the influence during delivery.

This hurts my heart deeply, knowing that this poor baby had to suffer the consequences, undeservingly, of his mother's choices. I have no idea what pushed her to take drugs while pregnant in the first place, and I feel very sorry for her. But the point is, if you are growing precious life inside of you, why harm the body that is nourishing that little life, deserving of love and a chance?

At the same time, this makes me mad beyond words. I have to admit that I miss the days in which I could drink beer and wine in a few occasions, and I also miss dancing hard and break a thick sweat, and I also miss rough-playing with my husband (we literally horse around, nothing sexual here)... but I must put those things on hold while my baby is receiving the proper care it needs while in my womb. I had to stop eating junk food and replace my burgers with salads and homemade meals. I cave every now and then because I need something fast, but that's it.

Case in point, mothers-to-be out there, whether your pregnancy is desired or not: your body is not your own anymore. It is not yours while there is someone living in it. That little life is counting on you, for nurturing, protection, care, growth, strength...please don't invade it, don't misuse it. I know nine months sound pretty long, but I'm halfway through my pregnancy, and it feels like it was just yesterday when I had my 6-8week nausea, or when my belly wasn't big. Time passes by so fast, you can hold on and wait to do with your body as you please, but please do not do it while nurturing a little person inside you. They don't deserve the negativity and the mistreatment you give your body, because everything you do, everything you eat and drink, even what you feel (anger, despair, anxiety, etc.), the baby can feel it all, and will receive it all, too!

I hope and pray that this mother opens her eyes at the harm she has done to her baby, and that she may be freed from this addiction, these chains that Satan has her tightly secured and imprisoned with. I pray that this baby also finds a loving and caring family who would adopt him and give him the proper care and future he deserves.

Blessings,
Natalie <3

Why the Name?

This is the first blog I've ever created, so hi there! And welcome!

For a while I wanted to start a new blog, but I had no idea what to make it about. I mean, sometimes people have one topic they talk about, such as recipes, or even life-changing events, or decor ideas, right? This time was hard for me because I had many things I wanted to write about, many topics...but it was hard to choose what I wanted to be seen as.

I am a wildlife biologist who just graduated college, so I've had my share of adventures in the field. I am also a wife who's been married for almost three years. I am a Christian who tries to live and love people as Christ did, and constantly is seeking God. I am an artist with many talents, from singing to playing an instrument, even painting and acting. I am a pregnant, first-time mommy who is halfway through her pregnancy and I've been learning new things about my body I didn't know it was capable of doing. I am a thinker who thinks deep and through about what is happening in the world, not from a political point of view, but from the troubled society we are living in. I am a dreamer who aspires to be a game warden and put poachers in prison because I hate them! And finally, I am a friend who cares about others' problems ans tries to always bring a smile to people's faces, whether by saying something encouraging, or by doing something completely adorable and stupid.


Do you see my struggle now? I was wrecking my brains to come up with what I would be looked as, or what I should write about! Like myself and people say nowadays, "The struggle is real." The struggle was very real in this situation... but then, I sat back and said, "wait a minute. Why just being one, when I can be all of them?"

So that's how I came up with the name for my blog. I have many faces, and that is the beauty of being a woman: you can be anything you want, even if it involves being many things. The sky is the limit for what you want to do in life, use that space to create and mold and transform anything and everything around you, hopefully for the better ;)

As women, we are required (whether we want to or not) to play many roles: nurses, drivers, chefs, lovers, counselors, cheerleaders, philosophers, seamstresses... and the list goes on and on. So be any and everyone of those things, but most important: be a woman.

The sky is the limit for your talents and gifts!

Blessings,
Natalie <3